Wednesday, March 24, 2021

Here We Go One More Time

 

Since last November I have been having alot of pressure under my belt on the right side. The surgery in October was to alleviate that. It has gotten worse to the point that when I feel the pressure if I push down the area, I can make it go away for awhile only for it to return. Yesterday, I had an appointment with my surgeon who did the previous surgeries and she said (in her words) “your appendix is being a little b#@&!#d. I removed the scar tissue from it last time because it was folded in half. It appears it folded again so I am going to remove it.” She doesn’t want to because it can mess with your system but…here we go again. April 14th is the date.


Why do I mention all of that? Because since January of 2020 this will be my 7th time visiting the surgeon. After enduring many trips to the O.R. one begins to let their mind wonder what is going on. In fact I go one step further and wonder what God is trying to tell me. At this point in the game each trip to the O.R. is another step towards not dealing with feelings and emotions very well. Just when you think you are on top of things you get knocked down a few rungs.

This is the life of being human. What I can say is that I would rather do this with Jesus leading than doing it on my own. Many people throughout the Bible did not want to do what the Father has asked of them. In fact, Jesus himself said in Luke 19:42 “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will….”. Am I comparing myself to Jesus? Not by a long shot. What I am saying is that we all have to go through the valley to reach the next mountain top. David…the one God used mightily many times had his own issues. He is up again and down all throughout the Psalms. Some of the prophets throughout the Old Testament had mountain top experiences with God only wanting something else bad to happen to them after those moments. This is normal…this is being fully human. 


As I go into this next surgery, I am reminded that many others have gone through this as well. I dare not compare myself to anyone else less I be corrected by the ones who try and “one up” me regarding what they are going through. Trust me…there are plenty out there that would tell me what I am going through is nothing compared to what they are going through. As if they are proud of it or something. Regardless, we are all on different journeys and what I am going through…to me…is a big deal. Onward I go however and pray this is it now. 


So why blog about this? Well first and foremost is in hopes that you would pray for me. Second, to let others know going through a difficult time that you need to hang in there. Your friends, family and others need you. You will get through this and once again will be back on top of the mountain. 


When a person has so many things going wrong with them it is easy to be viewed as a basket case by others. People do really well in dealing with a one off illness. If it is ongoing however, we can have a hard time dealing with it. I know this because I am not the best at caring for people with ongoing or chronic issues. Lord knows I have said things I wish I could take back. Try being a pastor dealing with your own health while trying to counsel others. Some things do not come out well. What some need to understand though is that no one (unless they are sick upstairs) would want this path in life. Trust people who are going through one thing after another when they say "I can't wait for this to be over". The emotional toll this past year and more has taken on me has been a struggle. Through it all though I know God is in control. I will get this "check engine" light looked at once again and will be biking around the city in no time. 

Wednesday, March 17, 2021

Day 65 of 365: Doubt God?

 “Is it wrong that I doubt God?” This was the question of asked of me this evening. It was a question from someone newer to the faith but legitimately was wondering if it is okay to doubt God. What brought this person to ask this question was the fact that they do not work, has no home and is somewhat depressed. 

Whenever a person asks me these kinds of questions, I usually respond out of a heart of compassion and this case was no different. One could look at this situation and tell the person all kinds of things but really what needs to happen is to help them understand that we place a lot of troubles onto ourselves. As the old church would say “we give the devil to much credit for things we do to ourself.”


The fact is that we blame God (or the Devil) for a lot of things that do or do not happen in our life. For someone that has no money, housing, etc. I suppose the illogical step to take would be to blame God. The logical thing to do though (if physically capable) is to get a job. I am quite confident anyone needing employment these days could get hired the very same day. I have come to notice (and lived it) that if the job/money isn’t there then many MANY other things fall into place that will stress a person out BIG TIME.

God has given us all the ability to take care of ourselves. Sure there will be the times circumstances are simply out of our control but that is where he will step in. The next time we blame God for neglecting us…let’s take a step back and simply ask “am I helping myself by using the God given abilities he has given me?” 

Monday, March 15, 2021

Day 64 of 365: Family Vacation

 

The vacation. Something that as a pastor can be difficult to take for a few reasons. Coming from a smaller church it is always on the back of a pastors mind if they should be back in time for church that following Sunday. Who are they going to call if something happens with the building? What will people think if they go on vacation?

I remember back to 2005 when Tracy and I decided to go on vacation (out of the state). A lady from the church who is no longer with us told me “must be nice. Only rich people can go on vacation.” For some reason or another that ignorant comment has stuck with me all of these years. To be honest, I wanted to reply that “not necessarily rich but fiscally smart”.

Let me first say that vacations come in all different types of forms. From the staycation to simply driving somewhere in the state you live in for a day or two…a vacation is really a state of mind. Where you go is relative. 


The way I have been able to take my family on vacation the past two times via an airplane has been due in part to our Chase Southwest Airlines credit card. Tracy and I put pretty much all of our purchases on the credit card. At the end of the month we pay it off so there is no interest charges. By doing this we rack up frequent flier miles all year long. This past trip to Florida only cost us $50.00 in processing fees for all five of us to fly. 


Regarding hotel, once again Priceline came through. When traveling with a family of 5 it can become costly to eat out for every meal. There were two things I was looking for in a hotel and they were a continental breakfast and kitchenette. That way we could cook most meals in our hotel room after a simple visit to the nearest grocery store. If I were to book this room through the hotel’s website it would have cost me $340.00 per night. Thanks to Priceline, I found the same room for $120.00 per night. This was a win win situation. 


I have traveled so many times to Florida and other places that I have become quite savvy in doing things in a less expensive way. It has really been a blessing. With that said…yes…I will continue to go on vacations. I will continue to not answer text messages, etc. from church folk while I am away so that I can be fully present with my family. It is necessary to stay sane and to give my family some much needed downtime. 

Saturday, March 6, 2021

Day 63 of 365: Put The Book Down

I will admit right away this isn’t going to be a very long blog. It is about a funny thing my dad said when he was over earlier for my son’s birthday. While sitting on the couch he began to read a book I have regarding small churches and growth strategies. 

After he read a few pages of the book he simply asked “are you reading this book?” I said, well I have begun but am not sure I will continue. My dad continued to say “I take it you have to take what this book says with a grain of salt?” He went on to tell me, I thought each church was unique and that God is going to build his church. 


You know…my dad was never a pastor but he made a whole lot of sense with his comments. I think this book will go back on the self. 

Friday, March 5, 2021

Day 62 of 365: Which Way The Wind Blows

 Earlier this week I posted on Facebook that I have a song on repeat in my office. It is called "Which Way The Wind Blows" by 2nd Chapter of Act. I suppose I could go on and on about how awesome this group was from the Jesus movement era but the proof is in the pudding. Here are the lyrics...

Feel the feeling
Say the saying
But youll still be lonely
If you think life is only for this moment
Do a doing
Mourn a mourning
Still wont get you off your sorrows
So go ahead and cry your tears
But you cant cry and look at tomorrow
You dont know which way the wind blows
So how can you plan tomorrow
You dont know which way the wind blows
So how can you plan tomorrow
Run a running
Hide a hiding
Whenever you hear the truth
And you ask for the proof
You wont listen (listen)
Praise a praising
Build a building
Trying to get peace into your life
And you dont know wrong from right
Oh, wheres your wisdom
You dont know which way the wind blows
So how can you plan tomorrow
You dont know which way the wind blows
So how can you plan tomorrow
Die a dying
Resurrecting
By believing

There is something about this song that has given me a great peace. The other day I received word that my MS is no longer on my record. Today I learned that my surgeon wants to see me because of a potential complication pertaining to a hernia surgery. It is like a wind that will take you anywhere and everywhere. Regardless...I cling to Jesus and know that he is in full control. It has been said that the life of being a Christian contains mountain tops and valleys. One must cling to Jesus through it all. 

Thursday, March 4, 2021

Day 61 of 365: Multiple Sclerosis...The Final Chapter? No...The End

 

"Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven." ~ James 5:14-15


In March of 2015 my life was changed after having an extreme "aura headache" only to be diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS). The old pentecostal in me instantly told the church and the world about my ailment. People began to pray and support me in my journey. I wholeheartedly believe in the power of prayer. I saw my friend come back from the dead, another healed of cancer and more. That is just here at Radiant Fellowship. Growing up in church, I have countless stories of seeing healings happen. I ought not be surprised at these stories but am still amazed when it happens. 


Towards the end of last year which was very trying my smell was officially gone and it wasn't COVID related. I thought perhaps I was having an MS flare-up. You know the story with my sinuses requiring ANOTHER surgery at the beginning of this year. All was fixed though I am still working on getting my smell back.


Awhile ago I messaged my neurologist to see what they determined regarding my MS. It ends up the brain lesions they found in 2015 were iron deposits due to an iron condition I have which is under control. Today I received word from neurology that they are taking MS off my record and that I do not have it. PRAISE THE LORD!! Living with that on your mind all the time (pun intended) was very taxing. But I wanted to share the great news that I DO NOT HAVE MS! 


Thank you to those that supported me in prayer and words of encouragement. It is a blessing to have such friends of faith.

Monday, March 1, 2021

Day 60 of 365: My Finest Sermon (In My Opinion)

 

If someone were to ask me what my best sermon was in my 25+ years of preaching, it would probably go back to the fall of 2000. I remember that day like it was yesterday. The week prior I was away at a silent prayer retreat. The entire time God was speaking to me saying “it’s okay not to be okay. The things you deal with are of no surprise to me so don’t be afraid to talk about it.” 


After reading a book that was really influential in my life I put together a sermon talking about dealing with depression. I realized this would be a risk and I knew it would be one I would share in the “adult service” when the opportunity arose. After all, I was “just” the youth pastor and so speaking gigs in the adult service were very few and far between. I knew it was a message that I had to deliver though because the pastor I served under would often times make the congregation repeat after him “I am to blessed to be depressed”. Each time we were told to repeat it, I felt it was a slap in the face to those in the congregation that were dealing with depression. 


So that Sunday came and I began to talk about being broken before God. I gave many scriptural examples and drove the point with an illustration. After a lot of research, I expounded on how awesome revivalist/theologian Charles Spurgeon was. I read his writings, I studied his life and despite all that he did for the cause of Christ, he not only dealt with chronic pain but severe depression. This started at the age of 22. While he was preaching someone yelled “FIRE” and though there was no fire, it caused mass panic and seven people died. In fact 28 others suffered severe injuries.

Spurgeon plunged into a deep depression. It could hit him so intensely that, he once said, “I could say with Job, ‘My soul chooseth strangling rather than life’ [Job 7:15]. I could readily enough have laid violent hands upon myself, to escape from my misery of spirit.”


Through it all and despite his chronic pain he continued to preach. He loved Jesus and Jesus loved him. I was so proud of that sermon. Afterwards people were talking with me about what they were dealing with. Sometimes a person just needs permission to know it is okay to be vulnerable. We should understand this because “God loves us as we are; not as we should be because none of us are as we should be”. 


Some Christians just aren’t ready to hear that type of sermon. The next morning I was asked to step into the sanctuary so that the pastor could have a one on one with me. I was belittled and told my theology was off due to my misunderstanding of scripture. That moment resonated with me and I will never forget it. It so defined my path regarding how I treat people. Not with a heavy theological hand but with a tender heart filled with grace. Lord knows that is how God sees me and I certainly do my best to extend the same amount of grace to others. I don’t always succeed but I pray that all of us would understand that we are ragamuffins doing our best to accept and embrace the love of God. 

Sunday, February 28, 2021

Day 59 of 365: Treating Others With Dignity


This evening a group of us from Radiant Fellowship went out with our outreach program called the Rock. We have had this program going for many years. Each month we bring gently used clothing, toiletries and a warm meal to folks living in very low income housing. 


Tonight was a special time as it was one of our larger nights. I had fully planned on grilling but the weather this time of year is very temperamental which caused us to order some pizzas instead. 


When we pulled up there were quite a few folks in the lobby awaiting our arrival. We always begin by bringing in the totes of clothes first. We had many helping themselves to those items. There was a new lady that came to see what we were doing. After she heard there might be a winter coat for her, she began to dig through everything. I am please to say that she found a very nice winter coat with a big furry collar. She was thrilled to say the least. This lady and others found pairs of shoes, clothing and more. We never charge for this outreach and to be honest; unless they ask we do not tell them what church we are from. That is not the purpose of this outreach. It is to simply serve. 


As we were handing items out I began to joke around with a couple of them. The others from the church also engaged them in conversation. My father comes along and he was so proud to know the jacket he donated is still being used by the man he gave it to over a year ago. 


When we arrive I always strive to serve these people in a way that maintains their dignity. We don’t ask how they got there, what they are doing to get out of it...we just serve. I speak to these folks down on their luck the same way I would speak to someone running a successful business here in town. I see no need to view them any other way than as a child of God. If they want to talk about how they got there...I will engage but mainly listen. Regardless though, I point out flaws in my life and that we all go through moments in life. As I told one lady this evening “it takes a village” to help one another and that was why we were there. In my opinion a Christian that looks down on these people ought to check their heart. 


I became a pastor to serve. Sure that happens regularly inside of the church but why can’t it happen outside of it as well? Why do some Christians have to view these people as charity cases. You serve a person and you win every time. We now have one of the former tenants attending our church regularly. In fact he even got his own apartment across the street from the church. It is my opinion that the church would do well not to look away from people who are not like us but rather serve them as if we are serving Jesus himself. Wait! That sounds Biblical (sheep and goats). 


 

Saturday, February 27, 2021

Day 58 of 365: My Desk

A desk…it’s the one thing I want from my former youth pastorate. I have never been fired from a job. The only time when I quit a job on the spot was when I was working at a Christian bookstore in downtown Milwaukee. My former and colleagues and I put up with the owners garbage and verbal abuse because he was “well known” in the city for putting on the governors prayer breakfast. In fact he was such a head case that he felt he could berate us employees including his personal secretary. He would often refer to her weight which made me sick. It got to the point that I would fume if/when he would come in to his office. 

It all came to an end when in the middle of one day I taped the store key to his office door with a note not fit to be read on a Christian blog. I walked out and that was that. There was only one other time I quit a job and stuck around out of pure spite. That was when I was told “they don’t want you here” by the interim pastor of the church I gave 8 years of my life to as the youth pastor. 


The desk I had represented what I went through. When I became the youth pastor (and associate pastor) of this church, I was shown my office and the old desk that sat there. I remember asking “is there a possibility of getting a new desk?” I was told no because they knew they were bringing on a new youth pastor so I would have to work my way up to a nicer desk. 


Fast forward to the move into the newer building. I came back from my first anniversary trip which was protested by the pastor and board because I was going to be gone for the move. I was excited to get back to the new building and settle into my new office. I heard there were new desks awaiting. When I came back there was a new desk in the secretary’s and pastor’s office. My office was there but it was all in the garage. My desk included. They decided that I got the smallest room in the place and that my desk would not fit. When the pastor came in I asked what I should use and he said “you will have to find a card table to use since there are no funds for a new desk.” I knew this wasn’t the case so I literally walked out of his office, got in my car and drove to the local office supply store to pick up a new desk out of my own money. I had to pick up book shelves also since apparently the shelves I had were left at the old building. 


I recently reached out to that church and asked about my old desk. Last I knew it was still sitting in the garage. The youth pastor told me that it was good timing because he is going to be getting a new desk and the old one was going to be hauled off. Needless to say, I will be getting a picture tomorrow to confirm it is my desk. If it is, I will be driving down to Milwaukee to bring it back to Waupaca. I couldn’t be more thrilled to get this desk if indeed it is the one. It will serve a great purpose here. 


So why do I want my old desk? Because it held such great memories for me. It was my first youth pastorate and if the church planned on getting rid of it, I will use it in one of my two offices here. A remembrance of where I have come from in ministry. I am all about momentos and this is very special to me. 

Thursday, February 25, 2021

Day 57 of 365: Pastors Only Work on Sundays

“Pastors only work on Sundays don’t they?”. That was the question I was asked today for about the one thousandth time. Pastors get asked this ALL THE TIME be it “in jest” or a genuine question. Today it was the latter. 

I never really get upset over this question unless it is “in jest” which means it was meant as sarcasm and we all know that there is always a bit of truth in sarcasm. I kindly told this person that is not always the case. In fact it is NEVER the case. 


As a pastor of a smaller church, I maintain a strict daily schedule which I keep posted on the bulletin board in my office. Smaller church means the pastor wears more hats. I will admit that outside of Sunday mornings; Tuesday is my favorite day. You will see why. Here is what my schedule looks like…

Monday

- Record 7 days of My Utmost For His Highest

- Data entry

- Sermon rough draft


Tuesday

- Tech Day

- E-Newsletter

- Online Church Update

- Radio Show

- Post Podcasts


Wednesday

- Breakfast Huddle

- Royal Rangers


Thursday

- Sermon Prep

- Pastoral Care


Friday

   - Setup Church Computer for Sunday

     - Post songs


Looking at that schedule it can seem light to some but many steps are involved. Like recording My Utmost For His Highest. I love doing this but each recording needs to be edited down. I do not just record and post. The same applies to the radio broadcast, etc. Weekly online church updates involves a lot of coding each week. The embedded live service, messages, etc. don't automatically post each week. Royal Rangers is a solid 4 hour investment of my time which includes the meeting itself. Building maintenance is an ongoing thing that can be sprinkled into the week at any given moment.

One of the items on the list is pastoral care. Now Thursdays are my day to specifically reach out to individuals I have in mind. I am available for people to reach out to me anytime. For instance, this afternoon I went to sit down in my office and instantly I am talking with a manic depressive person using illegal substances so that they can relax. I was then notified of a friend of the church involved in a drunk driving accident. This was followed up by a person battling severe depression. I say all of that to mention I don’t mind this one bit but by time I was done “counseling”, it was evening and I had not gotten to the things I needed to get done. This means everything gets bumped to the next day since I do like to hang out with my family. 


For the record, I put the word counseling in quotes because people often mistake pastors for licensed counselors and we are not. There are a handful that are but as a general rule; pastors can provide wise counsel but we are not licensed. 


So…do pastors just work on Sundays? Not at all. In fact that is the easy day! The icing on the cake if you will because we get to deliver the message and hang out with awesome church folks. I am so thankful for the ones that help keep the church afloat by volunteering, etc. As I stated in a previous blog there will always be those who suggest things trying to put more on a pastors plate as well. At some point a pastor has to say no or...if your not willing to run with it then it simply will not get done. 

Day 56 of 365: The Covid Vaccine

 

This morning I tried to get on a local radio talkshow to express my opinion. The two hosts are some of my favorites. In fact in November of 2020 the station manager spoke at the church I pastor. The topic was regarding the upcoming election. After a new morning person was brought it in, I was pleased to see she was a mutual Facebook friend of mine from the Milwaukee area.

Long story short, I called in regarding the topic of who is and is not opting to get the COVID vaccine. Unfortunately, I was disconnected but these things happen in radio. It’s all good. I will admit that I have no plans to get the vaccine. My wife who works in healthcare shares my sentiments. We feel it is to new and we don’t know what the long term effects of it will be. I have no deep feelings that would appeal to conspiracy theorists. As a person that doesn’t even get the flu shot, I just don’t feel good about it. This coming from a guy whose entire family had COVID at the end of December. My father who is 81 did ask for my help in registering him to be on the waiting list to receive his shot. I am glad to say he was able to get the first dosage. I don’t begrudge anyone wanting it. I heard something from a caller this morning that I wanted to briefly address. 


This caller referred to the vaccine as the mark of the beast. I was pleased to hear the talkshow hosts downplay that notion. Usually a statement like that comes from a well meaning Christian. However, even well meaning Christians can show their lack of theology when throwing around terms like that. If this were the mark of the beast; it would mean we are in the tribulation period which would mean this caller and many other Christians missed the rapture of the church. Now that would be something scary. 


It has been my observation that many denominations and Christians believe we will be raptured before the tribulation period. This term in church circles would be called being a “pre-tribber”. There are those that believe mid-trib and post-trib as well. There are also a handful of people that would consider themselves preterists but that is an entirely different eschatological way of thinking which isn’t even biblical. The Bible has a strong stance on why we believe we will be raptured before the tribulation period. The mark of the beast though is estimated to begin halfway through the tribulation period which is a 7 year time span. 


With that said, no, the vaccine is not the mark of the beast. Like the microchip that some companies (even in Wisconsin) have decided to use on some employees, I say this is perhaps the technology leading UP TO that day but this certainly isn't the actual mark. I would encourage Christians to settle down on saying this or that is the mark of the beast. If they truly read and studied their Bible, one would realize just how off base they are making a statement like that. 

Wednesday, February 24, 2021

Day 54 of 365: Taking Opportunities

I am a firm believer that when opportunities come your way…take them! This has been my modus operandi since I got my first job at Mayfair Mall in 1990. Whenever my higher up would ask if I would be interested in helping with something, I would always say yes. This was true with most of the jobs I have worked. Even in ministry I have seen God’s favor when I say yes to a door has opened for me. 

Yesterday, I saw this happen once again in regards to a hobby I enjoy; that being photography. A friend from the church tagged me in a Facebook post for one of the nations largest old car shows. They were looking for photographers for this event and so I threw my name into the hat. The first email I received back was a general response saying “thank you for your interest, we will keep you in mind.” Quickly thereafter an actual person emailed me saying “Bob! I have seen and know your work. Welcome to the team.” That was a very welcome email during a time to be honest has been kind of blah. It was as if God knew I needed that little bit of encouragement. This is not a paying gig...well I take that back. They will donate to a charity of your choice which for me is a no brainer. 


Sometimes when we take opportunities afforded to us it could turn into something bigger and better. I have seen that over and over again in the jobs I have had. Other times, I have seen great opportunities come my way like this Iola car show and all it seemed to be was a little encouragement to God. Something to pick up a persons spirits to get them through to the next day. Regardless though, I am thankful for it all. 

Tuesday, February 23, 2021

Day 53 of 365: Offering Advice During a Pandemic

 

I was in a discussion earlier with many pastors from around our state. The topic of discussion was how our churches are doing through the pandemic. We have all suffered, learned and seen some good things through these difficult times. 


For Radiant Fellowship, we have been offering virtual church since 2010. During this pandemic however, we have exponentially ramped up our game. We went from a strategically placed webcam to a full on mixing console with direct sound from the sound board. The video is better as well. I am excited for the prospect of continuing on with our online presence. For a smaller church, we are doing what we can with what we have without having to go into debt over it. 


What has discouraged me however (and other pastors I have chatted with) are the well meaning parishioners that either watch from home or attend in person and critique the church while not pitching in. I can speak for the church that I pastor that a total of 6 people have kept this thing afloat during these difficult times. When we first had to shut down to when we were doing church in the parking lot with our FM broadcaster, we have done a lot. I am thankful that we did not have to shut down for one week during all of this. I attribute this to the amount of tech and teamwork it took to stay a float. 


I recall not long into having to do church differently and amidst my moments of panic, I received a text message saying our worship is doing the same songs. There was even one that rolled in stating we should start our kids ministry as well. These well meaning comments are fine really. My only gripe is that they were coming from people that were not willing to step in or attend in person so that they could help. Trust me when I say a pastor knows what is missing or could be ramped up during these times…at least they should. The last thing they need to hear from a person is what’s missing or what could change without offering some degree of help. 


Many pastors have left the ministry during this pandemic. Many MANY more are really tired but looking on the bright side of life. This according to an article/video by Barna,

“When it comes to emotional well-being, there are both positive and negative trends. Despite disruptions, over half of pastors (55%) have primarily felt happy in the last week, and other favorable emotions surface too (36% grateful, 26% optimistic, 16% content). Yet another half (51%) admits they were tired. Two in five say they primarily felt exhausted (41%), sad (41%) or panicked (39%) last week. Other concerning emotions less commonly felt include a sense of being powerless (17%), angry (16%) or indifferent (5%). There are some signs that leaders could be receiving support, however; over one-third felt helped (37%) or strong (35%).”


I say all of that to say this, when you offer a suggestion to a pastor…rethink it. If you are not willing to step in and help then it might not be so wise to offer your constructive criticism. We will get back to normal at some point but many churches (the one I pastor included) run and rely on volunteers. I am so thankful for all that they do and will not even consider asking them to do more. We’ve come this far and we will make it to the end. 

Sunday, February 21, 2021

Day 52 of 365: I Suck?

You Suck! Those were the words I received in an anonymous text this afternoon while talking to my dad on the phone. I had just come home from church and really enjoyed the morning seeing many come back to church after being away for awhile. No matter how many times a critique or mean comment comes my way, it always takes me by surprise. It’s never easy to deal with. 

It is easy for me to let my mind wander and think about who might have sent it but that proves to be frivolous. The reason being that this coward or cowards are using an anonymous texting service. This is very indicative of the society we live in today which has been fostered since the internet first got going. 


Our world is in a place where everything can be debated, rated and heavily critiqued. We make it so easy to do so. I remember my times of being a youth pastor the kids talked about a website called “hot or not”. You could literally rifle through pictures of the opposite sex and give them a thumbs up or thumbs down. Online reviews via Yelp, Google, Yahoo, Facebook, etc. took off as well. We almost have made it a hobby to critique things. If you had a good experience then you rate it well. Perhaps that dining experience was not so much; a barrage of online reviews which spreads like wild fire will then begin.  


Negative comments and reviews somehow standout. You can get 20 nice compliments but the one that crawls into your headspace is that negative one. Don’t believe me? How many times have you looked at reviews for a product you wanted to buy off Amazon? You can read all of those positive reviews but the minute you read a negative one, you decide not to purchase the item. It happens a lot. 


This world would be a better place if we heeded the advice from many of our parents/grandparents. You know the saying “if you don’t have anything nice to say; then don’t say anything at all.” We have to learn to play nice and for those on the receiving end of these gripes...we must develop thick skin and press on. 

Saturday, February 20, 2021

Day 51 of 365: Cigars

 

Do you know what the difference is between a $10.00 cigar and a $50.00 one? I asked a cigar shop owner this very question and the response I received was intriguing. He said, “there is no difference really. The fact that you paid $50.00 for one however means that that cigar demands your attention.” He went on to tell me how when you slow down to enjoy something you will notice all the little details of it. 


This got me thinking quite a bit lately which is really good because this question was asked almost 8 years ago. There is a saying in the Zen religion that goes like this “When you drink tea…drink tea.” Both of these sayings are reminders of how much we ought to live in the moment. That we would do well to live each day as though it matters. 


James chapter 4 verse 14 says “What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” Isn’t it funny how the Bible, Zen and cigar theology all point to the need to slow down and not worry about tomorrow? Yet, we don’t. 


Let me just say that if self-help books really helped then we would be living our best lives. We get so wrapped up into the next day or that next thing on the schedule that we really find ourselves not enjoying the here and now. Some people have a hard time sitting down and doing nothing. It’s as if they almost feel guilty for doing that. It's not okay. 


So many times us as Christians are living chaotic lives that even in our downtime we are thinking of the next thing to do. How about we live a little. If you have kids take them sledding or some other activity. Do something for yourself like read a book, take up a hobby or find some time to nap. We will find that our lives will be happier if we live in the now verses always worrying about the next thing. 

Friday, February 19, 2021

Day 50 of 365: Dealing With Criticism

 

So the other day I received a short and to the point email. All it said was “Hi there, I really do not appreciate Classic Rock.... (signed…blah blah).” I left the name out to protect the innocent and curmudgeonie. This person was referring to the current series I am in. Now, I have taken a lot of hits over the years and this one really wasn’t so bad. As my mom would say “just consider the source” and so I am moving on.

I wonder how many people reading this has ever been criticized? Have you ever done something that you were proud of only for it to be taken down? This happened when I wrote my first book. There was a structured take down by a few people. Much like this random email…you get that warm hazy feeling like when you have been kicked in the stomach. 


I suppose one could get cranked up and not think about what you say back to this person but what does that accomplish? I can tell you first hand not a whole lot of good. How do I know this? Let’s just call it experience. The whole critique was on one small item and yet how is it we can be utterly dominated by it? This doesn’t just apply to pastors but business owners, realtors, beauticians…on and on the list goes. 


What I have come to learn is that the goal with all criticism is to become a non-reactive presence. Proverbs 15:1-2(NIV) A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.  The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness. It’s not healthy to take that criticism and immediately start throwing punches. Why? Because you don’t know what else is in the room. 


What else is in the room? The first thing to ask when someone confronts you is that simple question…what else is in the room? You make a big mistake when you take the first critique and try to address it. Proverbs 20:3(NIV) Avoiding a fight is a mark of honor; only fools insist on quarreling. You can go after that first question and completely miss the question behind that question. I have discovered many years ago that you do not have to defend yourself. First impulse is usually to defend. The first thing however is to ask questions so that you can address the issue behind the issue. For example…what is the question behind the question. What is the critique behind the critique? Fear behind the fear? Issue behind the issue?


For some people in churches they see something they don’t like and it is a trigger for how things were at their previous church. We see this in marriages don’t we? Now the truth is sometimes you threw the first punch. The goal however is to be a non-reactive presence. Don’t respond right or reply with an email right away…it will not be your finest work. The trick is to take a breath, say a prayer and not respond. Your greatest gift to them is being a non-responsive presence. Matthew 5:9(NIV) Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Bottom line from what I have learned over the years regarding random pot shots is to control myself. Trust me when I say a person really doesn’t want to meet Bob. He’s not a very nice guy when backed into a corner. This saved, redeemed pastor Bob is much nicer. You see, you will develop great power if you are not tossed to and fro by the latest email or random text message. No critique ever comes at the right time. People like when others are spinning out of control. Don’t give into it.

What did I do with this email? I simply replied back stating we are all entitled to our opinions. 

Thursday, February 18, 2021

Day 49 of 365: Keeping Cards

 

I found these cards the other day in my stash of memories that my dad passed along to me after my mom passed away. After my mom passed away my dad began weeding out many things that he no longer wanted to hang on to. I did not begrudge him for doing this because he was planning on making a move to Waupaca. 


My mom held onto a lot of things one of them being greeting cards. One entire drawer of her dresser was filled with cards. A majority of them were ones she received from relatives, etc. The ones I found though were very special to me because they were from the days she was only 20 years old. 


I always wondered why my mom would hang onto cards and then it hit me after she passed away. In my office, I have two cards from her that she gave me the year she passed. One was for my birthday and the other was for father’s day. Each year now when it is my birthday or father’s day, I take a moment to read those cards. It is as if my mom just wrote those cards to me and it makes me so appreciative. 


To this day I save cards from my wife, kids and dad. This may sound morbid but to be honest, I realize we do not know what is going to come our way from day to day. A simple way to remember a person is by keeping cards. For those of us that lost someone close, we know how hard the holidays are along with birthdays. A simple card does not take up a whole lot of space but when the time is right, you will be glad you saved them. 

Day 48 of 365: Joy In The Journey?

 

Joy in the journey? This was a phrase thrown around quite a bit when I posted this picture a few years ago. This picture of a church bulletin from my first service at Radiant Fellowship has been something I kept in my “momentos” file in my desk. Yes, I have a file where I keep pictures, newspaper clips, etc. When I came to the church in Waupaca and received this bulletin it was very nice and I was honored. Truth be told though, I was also a train wreck. 


The things I went through in ministry to get to this point were nothing but painful. Joy was a word that I did not equate to the moment when I saw my name in that bulletin.


Just a few weeks prior to coming up to Waupaca, I was hopeful. The pastor I served under made some poor moral choices and I thought since I was the youth and associate pastor of that church for 8 years that I would be considered as the new pastor. I submitted my resume with great anticipation only to be told a week later sitting at a Perkins with the interim pastor to pull my resume. I asked why because Tracy and I loved that church. We were told “because the board doesn’t want you there.” 


Fast forward just a few weeks and there I was in Waupaca. Sure, I could have taken two other positions but this one felt right. Little did I know a year and a half later I would go through a storm once again. 


I say all of that because when someone goes through a very difficult time in life. The last thing you would want to say to them (though well meaning) is that there was joy in the journey. Honestly, I can say there was zero joy in that journey. God certainly redeemed that situation but to say there was joy? Probably no. I am pretty confident many in the Bible would agree with those sentiments.

This is the life of a pastor though. There are MANY joys in the journey but there are certainly many non-joyous moments as well. Through it all though I have learned to trust in Jesus and let him direct my steps. 


Side note: I have since shredded this bulletin since I don't even consider that to be a part of this current church.

Wednesday, February 17, 2021

Day 47 of 365: I Love Blogging

As it stands right now my blog has had 196,317 views. To me that is staggering to think about even though I have been blogging since 2010. This number ticks up each day by a few more unless I get really opinionated and then it tacks on about 200+ views per day. 

One of the things that still gets me about my blog is how it has ruffled so many feathers when a majority of the posts are simply my opinion. I have received a ton of positive comments for blogs that I have written over the years. Blogs ranging from being green to my thoughts on movies. 


The thing that stands out to me the most though have been the ones that told me my writings have ruffled feathers at their church. This happened at a couple of churches in Milwaukee, Waupun and even in my own city. My cousin who was on the board at a church in Waupun told me that I was regularly talked about in the lobby at their church regarding my writing. There were a couple of times that the pastor would blast me from the stage. Some might get offended when that happened but I always considered it a badge of honor. I am not saying I was always right because Lord knows that was not the case. 


Regardless of all of that, I will keep on blogging my thoughts as I see it through the eyes of a pastor. It is funny how some can get so worked up over another persons opinion. Here is my thought about blogs (since they are one persons opinion); don’t take them so seriously and if you have opinions about things then start your own blog. It’s actually kind of therapeutic. 

Day 46 of 365: Jesus Lingo

In Christianity we can say some pretty goofy things. I have, you have….we are all guilty of it. My biggest pet peeve Christianese saying though has to be when missionaries say “We are going to take God to…..”. I realize what they are saying but the fact is God is already there. It doesn’t matter if it is Sudan, Manila or the inner city of Chicago. A missionary is not going to be taking God anywhere. He is already there. 

Yesterday a local church posted a video in an attempt to get their congregants back into church. Let me clarify that I understand the desperation in wanting to see this happen. We have been on again, off again with meeting in person more times than I care to mention. People have become conditioned to the virtual church thing and it shows with in person attendance. 


In this video though one of the workers from the church said “Jesus is looking for you.” I have to admit this gave me the ebgbs because I knew what this person was saying but once again…Jesus has found you. It is very reminiscent of when God was looking for Adam in the book of Genesis. He asked Adam “Where are you?” He knew…it was more of an inner question however. 


I have learned a long time ago to leave these catchy little phrases alone. The heartbeat of God in the New Testament is the local church. I am convinced of that. There is a lot of joy when any church can have all of it’s congregants there. Fact is the church suffers greatly in volunteers, fellowship, tithes, social events, etc. when there are so many missing. I just think instead of saying “Jesus is looking for you” it would be better to just say “we really miss you”. Jesus has found us…nuff said.

Day 45 of 365: If God is Prodding You...

 

Listening to the voice of God is a very important thing in the life of a Christian. For me, I can honestly say the way He speaks to me is through persistent prodding or having a peace about something. Yesterday was one of those times I listened to God in what I should do. 


Back in 1994 when I worked in a Christian bookstore, we stocked a new holy hip-hop compilation called, Microphone Theology. This featured new up and coming artists. The very first cut was one called, We Mobbin by a group called S.S. Mob (Soul Saving Ministers on Board). It was phenomenal and a breath of fresh air. From that day on I kept an eye out for any new albums from this group. The lead person was a guy named, Shon. His name in the group S.S. Mob was King Shon and to this day has a very distinct voice and persona. 


These days Shon works with huge names in hip-hop like Drake and others. His business called Gold Street Entertainment is very successful. I have messaged him here and there and we always had cordial conversation. Yesterday though I felt the prodding to send him this message…

“Hey Shon, 

I realize we have never met. We have chatted back and fourth though. Back in 1994 I remember stocking the compilation Microphone Theology. The first track on that album was, We Mobbin. After that album hit our store, I kept my eye open for other albums from S.S. Mob. Living in Milwaukee, I knew those albums were going to hit...and they did. 


I am now a pastor at Radiant Fellowship (www.radiantfellowship.net) in Waupaca which is two hours north of Milwaukee. It's a smaller rural church working it's way through this pandemic. I have been here 17 years now. 


With all of that said, I know you hear from a lot of people each day. What I am not sure is that you hear the words, I am proud of you. Shon, what you have done in the industry is absolutely amazing. It is evident that God's blessing is on you and so from a 46 year old pastor that once sold many of your albums, I would like you to hear those words from me. I am proud of you man. You've come a long way. Keep on keeping on. 


God Bless,”


It wasn’t very long that I received this message back from him.

“WOW WOW WOW .. man of God & wow .. you have left me speechless and deeply moved because you’re right I don’t hear those words & only God could’ve told you that. I have maybe a few pastors over the years that are very proud of me and then some in the hundreds watch me ( online in my Instagram esp just watching ) still waiting for me to fail somehow not saying one single word.  I cherish this today Bob and I thank you .. God spoke through you today for me I’m so blessed I’ve been showing all of my staff ( I jus mentioned this a few days ago & many times here & there over the years, 

My roots come from a Hispanic ministry & im black so they see me as a person but not as a son ) .. so I give you triple thank you’s to tell you thank you again for blessing me today I’m glad I was able to be a blessing to you and still am .. 

I can’t describe to you the feeling I have but I thank you man of God .. thank you Pastor Bob thank you.”


What I am saying is that it does not matter who the person is and on what level they are. If God is prompting you to speak life into someone else then do it. I was so blessed by the fact that it was the right timing for this guy.

Day 44 of 365: Lent

 

I will have to admit that lent is something I have never really practiced. Being raised in an Assemblies of God church (pentecostal), this was something never really practiced…and here’s the thing…that’s ok. 


Lent is something that historically has been practiced by methodists, lutherans and catholics. It is the practice of giving up something. According to the BBC “Millions of people do this during Lent as a sign of sacrifice and to test their self-discipline. Christians believe that this is to represent Jesus Christ's sacrifice when he went into the desert to pray and fast for the 40 days before later dying on the cross.” 


It is a common thing to give up something that they hold dear. For some it is social networking and others it might be a certain kind of food. My pastor friend said for lent he is giving up prayer and reading the Bible. Of course he was just kidding so settle down. 


I have no problem with lent or the people that practice it. What I do have a problem with is the ones that consider it a Biblical practice. Honestly, when someone makes the practice of lent to be a Christian attribute…it is at that moment legalism creeps in.

What I mean by that is if a person judges you on something that is not even scriptural, there is a problem. This is how legalism works. Let’s say a new church starts singing, How Great Thou, Art. A person might stand up when that song hits the chorus. Over time more people will stand and/or raise a hand during it. Well, other people might not stand but if the majority is and said person is not then they are looked almost down on.

This can be said of lent. If you practice it…keep on keeping on. If you do not then that is okay as well. What really matters is that you are serving the Lord. 

Monday, February 15, 2021

Day 43 of 365: Christian?

 

It would appear I snoozed a lot of people on Facebook 31 days ago. Sometimes I am not sure what is worst. Christians using scripture WAY out of context or Christians that keep blasting the church or those that have no religious affiliation simply firing off ignorant comments about current events. Simply wanting to spread hate under the moniker of "trying to make a difference." 


Fact of the matter is that those who are not Christians and act out, I have way more of a tolerance for them than I do for the ones that call themselves Christians and are constantly posting toxic stuff. It’s pretty easy…Jesus said “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” If a Christian is posting a lot of hate….plain and simple….they are not a Christian. 


We all have our flaws but when you are constantly being a hateful person, you are the furthest thing away from Christ. Don’t believe me? What about where Jesus said “By their fruit you will recognize them.” Plain and simple…don’t see fruit…you can’t possibly be a Christian. For a Christian to steam roll those who do not think like them (applies to politics) are like someone who runs a person over only to ask if they can help them up. 


I am convinced that if you want to be a witness for Christ these days then be nice. That’s it…that’s all there is to it. If you want to keep tarnishing the title of Christian then keep on keeping on. 

Sunday, February 14, 2021

Day 42 of 365: Today Was a Tough Day

Today marked one of the toughest Sundays I have had in a long time. Quite a few factors played into it to be honest. The temperature being in the tank at -15 degrees along with snow removal made for a miserable pre church experience. I am grateful for a great snow blower but the fact one is snow blowing in -15 degree temps made things a bit frustrating. It’s not that it snowed a lot but we did receive some the day before and then the blowing took place. 

Once I came inside there was the minor task of not only being the speaker but also the coffee maker, sound man, virtual church tech and more. Can I just say how difficult it is to run the tech end of life while needing to deliver a sermon? Yeah it’s not my favorite and should this predicament happen again we simply won’t meet in person. It will be only virtual. 


The redeeming factor in it all though was the fact that my friend, Glenn Kaiser was willing to record a worship set for the church. All one has to do is Google that name and you will see all of this man’s accomplishments. What is refreshing about this scenario is that there are still a handful of artists willing to this type of thing. Many Christian artists these days (and this has been the case for a long time) don’t really do these kind of things unless there is talk of a healthy honorarium and more. There are still artists that do Christian music for ministry.


To be honest I am glad this day is over in that aspect. COVID has been difficult on churches and I am glad we have made it this far. 

Friday, February 12, 2021

Day 42 of 365: 25 Years in Full Time Ministry

 

While kicking back this evening and scrolling through memories on Facebook, I was reminded that 25 years ago today I entered into full time ministry as a pastor. It’s funny how that seemed so long ago. Those were good days when I first took the position. Never once in ministry as a pastor did I apply to be on staff. The way I became a youth pastor was through a Christian skate night that I would DJ every Friday night. The pastor from Bay View A/G brought his group up to skate. My youth pastor and this guy spoke and eventually I was asked if I would like a youth pastor position. 


After staying at that church for 8 years, I decided to resign and move along thanks in part to the advice of a friend in the district office of the Assemblies of God. Even though this past August we celebrated 15 years at Radiant Fellowship, the fact is that I have been there for 17 years. I choose not to keep that first segment as youth pastor in my memory. It was an awful time for me and my wife. 


Anyway, here’s to another 25 years in ministry! I think I am going to celebrate tomorrow by stopping at Kwik Trip for a rice crispie square. 

Day 41 of 365: A Role Model to My Daughter

 

Ever since I have been married to Tracy (19 years this June), I have enjoyed doing things for her. From showing up at her work with a Starbucks and flowers to surprising her with gifts…this is something I enjoy doing. My favorite was when my kids and I brought a picnic lunch to her at work this past summer since we could not go in. This probably trickles over from the fact that my love language is physical gifts. She knows she is loved because I tell her every day but I have always been a gift giver. I am quite confident that I got this trait from my mom. 


It has been in the back of my mind that the kids are watching everything I do. This really came alive to me when I surprised Tracy with a new car this past November. Her car was getting A LOT of miles on it and so I decided to trade in my Chevy HHR with 180,000 on it. Now I use her old car as my cruiser. I used that trade in towards a new ride for her. It was a fun thing for me to do. I loaded the kids up in it and drove to the place where she works. After taking the plates off of her car and putting them on the new car, I then put the new car where she normally parks complete with a bow on it. I parked the old car down a ways in the parking lot. After watching a movie on my iPad complete with snacks, Tracy came walking out of work. The kids got to see first hand Tracy’s surprised look. 


When we got home that night we ate dinner. Emma said “Mom…you got a good man. He knows how to treat you.” This lead into a conversation with her from Tracy regarding how a man should treat a lady. Of course it is not always going to be a car, but to show acts of love and kindness is huge. Just this morning Tracy said she was freezing so after I got done removing snow at home and church, I stopped at Dunkin for a mocha. Emma saw that and was happy for Tracy. A simple mental note on my part made for another thoughtful gesture. 


A few days ago, I surprised the family with plans for spring break. I addressed everyones envelope with a label that said “TOP SECRET: NAME”. For Tracy’s I did not use her name but rather Sweet Cheeks McGee. Emma once again could not stop talking about it, laughing, etc. She was truly enthralled by that name. That I would call Tracy that. It was another teaching moment for her. Emma read the envelope yesterday once again and just said "Sweet Cheeks McGee" followed by a giggle. 


Since that day I have said, “you be sure when you eventually date that the man treats you the way I treat your mom.” I went on to say “any guy that wants to date you will have to be approved by me (jokingly) so that he knows how to treat a lady. If he doesn't pass...I will punch him”. Fact is there have been many times where I have taken James and Noah (though still very young) to surprise Tracy at work so that they can see how a man should treat a lady. No doubt they see me doing laundry, dishes and cooking dinner as well.


The Bible talks a lot about mentoring the younger ones. It is so easy to get wrapped up into the day to day dealings that one can forget the little things which really turn out to be big. When you are a parent there are always little eyes watching how you treat your spouse. I would imagine the same applies even when your kids are grown up. It is always important to model to your kids what a Godly husband or wife ought to be. Of course there will be some not so glorious moments…this is life. As a whole though we ought to do our best. I am a romantic and love pampering my wife. I am glad….it’s an answer to prayer really that my daughter is taking notice so that she knows not to settle for a shlub but rather someone who is going to love her the way her daddy loves her mom. 

Day 40 of 365: Church and Technology

 

During rona season it is vitally important for churches to be wired in. It doesn’t matter the size of the church, you can be virtual with fancy high end equipment or bare bones. At the end of the day if you have a smartphone, you can run a full on virtual church experience. Of course there are some higher end ways of doing this. I am absolutely convinced the way we do church will forever be changed due to this time in life. 

I recall a time in 2007 when I proposed to setting up a virtual church page on our website. It was met with doubt and hesitancy. The fear was that people would end up staying home, not giving, not getting involved, etc. Little did that group realize just a couple of years later we would dabble with online church. In 2009 we began streaming our services via services like Periscope, UStream, etc. Since that time we have been offering our services online. With Facebook and other social networking sites offering streaming services FOR FREE it has never been easier. 


These days it is a way of life for the church. Contrary to popular belief you do not have to spend thousands of dollars to get it done. I was shocked when I heard of one church spending just over $10,000 to be online. This was over the top for their needs. Bottom line is if you are pastor and wondering how to do the online thing…email me: PastorBobAdams@gmail.com and I would be glad to show you how to do this. 


Technology should be used regularly in churches. If you are opposed to it and struggling to stay afloat in these times please realize it is okay to do this. Even more so you can learn…it’s quite easy.